Feeling like a nobody?

I've been thinking a lot about my identity.

By certain standards, I used to be a "somebody".  I was a long-time leader in a church of what must now be around 1400 attendees.  I was responsible for a team of about 40 volunteers, all of whom seemed to be highly-motivated to be part of the worship ministry.  Heck, my wife and I would even once-in-a-while be approached around town (back in SoCal) by total strangers, calling us by name, telling us how much they appreciated our ministry.  I must now confess that it was a big inflation of my ego, yessir.

But now, through the compulsion of the Holy Spirit to leave all of that, I find myself to be a much smaller "fish".  Granted, I love my present "pond" much more — who wouldn't?  I'm in NW Montana, for Pete's sake! — and the Spirit of God is causing some lifelong dreams to be fulfilled (to the praise of His glorious grace).  Still, sometimes I mourn the loss of my former community, and yes, my former apparent "significance".  I get the feeling that some of my friends and extended family are astounded that I would depart from such measures of success, only to jump into a totally different life and certain obscurity.  (I'm tempted here to go into a long defense of such action, citing scriptural and historical justification, but I'll not digress.)

Yet, there is something wonderful coming of all this.  Jesus is becoming more real to me.  I'm learning — experientially — that He is jealous for my affection, for my trust, for my future; and that He, being the Consuming Fire that He is, will burn up anything that gets between us — financial security, social position, pharisee-ism.  Yes, I owned all of these, and they are being melted away.  Yet, He remains:

For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ.  If anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, their work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work.

— 1 Corinthians 3:11-13

They say "You're nobody 'til Somebody loves you".  Well, I guess that I'm not a nobody, after all.

Somebody — The great I AM — loves me as much as His One and Only Son.  AMAZING!

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Please continue to pray that the Lord would continue to shape our little family into His likeness, that He would provide for us in all areas, and that He would expand our impact in building His Kingdom on earth, as it is in Heaven.

Next Post:  Pictures of our family, preparing the "Homestead" land that the Lord is providing for us.